EVERYONE IS NEEDED!

I've been around the Internet adoption community for years. I've always found it unfortunate that many who have been reunited will never be heard from again. Perhaps some think there is no need to stick around. But there is because the adoption reform movement could be a long ways from being completed.

Some do very little searching themselves and I find that unfortunate since it can help prepare for the reunion. Perhaps this group feel that they can not be of help to others searching. Perhaps they are not interested in if anyone else finds birth family. I've known adoptees who get what they want and could care less about others.

Reunions are an emotional roller coaster ride. Probably not just for the adoptee but for all involved. I do know first-hand what an overwhelming feeling it is to be reunited with birth family members. There are of course other feelings to deal with. When birth parents are found deceased as mine were, there are questions that are left unanswered. Although I've had family members share what they know they have not been able to answer all my questions.

For many years now I've been an advocate for open records and I sincerely hope that no medical problem will ever prevent me from continuing. Although I'm not nearly as involved with helping others search as I once was my work on earth is not completed as far as the adoption reform movement goes. It does not matter that I have my original birth certificate (OBC) and I've been reunited. I want all adoptees to have their OBC. I want those who want to be reunited with birth family. I'm not alone because there are many others fighting for the cause and some are like me in having their OBC and been reunited.

Some who have been reunited will suddenly disappear. So it is important to remind those searching to stick around. They might need a break to deal with so many emotions, perhaps to travel to meet birth family and time to get to know those they have been separated from. But it is important to get the message out that everyone is needed to fight for all adopted adults to have access to their OBC. Please do your part!

NO CAUSE FOR CELEBRATION

I find it so hard to believe that there are supporters of CA AB 372. I question if it is a strong case of stupidity or if they are seeing $ signs before their eyes if this bill would become law. I realize that some of these supporters believe that baby steps are sometimes necessary to achieve success. But they are not stopping to think about the states who have taken baby steps and now how hard advocates are fighting to get open records in those states. It is not just CI programs that are intact in some states that make legislators think that the state is up to date with adoption reform. If anything is in place that makes legislators think this, they can focus on other issues and fight any clean bill that is sponsored.

Some think that if a few adoptees are helped, that is better than none. No, it is not because all should be treated equally. Let's say there are two adoptees in one family. One gets their OBC and the other can not. Think about the feelings that will develop between these two and how the adoptive parents will feel about their children not being treated equally. This could happen with two adoptees who are close friends too or two cousins who were adopted... Will all the CA adoptees who support this horrible bill have access to their OBC? Chances are not all of them will. Then how many years will it take for adoption legislation to be changed for the better in CA? Will the supporters live long enough to see it happen or will it ever happen?

The chances of this bill being fixed are very slim. Supporters need to wake up and smell the roses in the states who do have open records. This bill MUST be defeated and the sooner the better. There are those who will argue that we all must unite to get records open. Well many of us have done so and we ask that you please join us and not support a bill that does not treat ALL adoptees equally. The adoption reform movement must move forward and not backward.

TAKING ADVANTAGE OF THE VULNERABLE

More and more blogs are being written by those who do rip off those searching. Some of the blogging does give good searching information while I've read some that is misleading. A blog about searching for adoption records will lead those searching to read it. Then there will be links to check public records, for birth records... Searching for a name is free but getting the information is not. BUT believe me, you will not always get the information that you are led to think is forthcoming by paying a fee or subscribing to a database for a month or a year. I just searched at one website for a birth record for an IL adoptee. I was told that it is available. It is NOT available. Plus it was misleading to be told how much information is available on this person when I know that it is not. This person lives like a hermit with no street address and not nearly as many public records are available for him as the average person. I had no reason to pay the current special of $39.95 annual subscription. But if someone else who does not know this person were searching for him, they might pay it. I have no idea what information they might receive but it could not be much and maybe nothing at all.

If a PI say claims to be able to find a birth parent for $250, think about what information you have. Chances are they will not find a birth parent for $250 unless you provide the name and last known address. Many adoptees don't have a copy of their OBC. Some are fortunate to know the name of their birth mother from another source. But if you have the name and last known address, you might be able to find the person yourself. One never knows how much more money might be asked for after the $250 initial fee either when it is discovered that a marriage application/license or other documents are necessary in order to complete the search.

The only thing that makes me more angry than those taking advantage of the vulnerable are those who are fighting open records with no restrictions.

We must continue to fight for ALL adult adoptees to be able to request and receive their OBC. If you have not joined in to see what you can do to help with the adoption reform movement, please do so today.