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The recent rally in Philadelphia IMHO was an embarrassment to the adoption reform movement. The pictures indicate there was lack of organization and no one with leadership skills overlooking the making of signs or how those in attendance were holding them. There should be ways that some of us can get legislators to realize that the group in Philly did not speak well for our cause.This has been one of the saddest events to occur during the more than 30 years that I've been an advocate for open records.
On May 10, 1997 when I first met Joann and three other birth siblings, my son and I were welcomed into their lives with open, warm & loving arms. It was almost like we had always known each other except the questions that flowed back and forth between the birth siblings, my son and I did indicate differently. Similarities were shared among us and the family physical resemblance was remarkable between us plus the pictures that they had brought along to show Eric and I.On June 6, 2009 I said goodbye to Joann after her passing away suddenly and unexpectedly three days earlier. On July 11 when a memorial service is held, I will say goodbye once again.
Life is short but to only know Joann for such a short time has resulted in additional emotions for me to deal with along with grieving the loss of her. I hold no hard feelings toward our mother for placing me for adoption. Although she was deceased when the family was found and I could not ask her the reason, I do feel she did what she felt was best. I received a good home just as I’m sure she wanted.
To have known Joann for 12 years was a true blessing. It did not take me long to realize that she was bubbly with laughter and really enjoyed having fun. One of the sentences on her memorial card is, “I’d like to leave an after glow of smiles when life is done.” She certainly did that as different ones remembered her. Although we were experiencing a sad occasion there was a lot of laughter just as I’m sure that Joann would have wanted. I know that all of us will smile when we often think of her from now on.
Joann was only part of my life for a short time. But she helped to fill the void within me as only another adoptee can relate to. She did it in a very loving way. Each time I was around her I did enjoy some laughs too. Thank you Joann and goodbye until we meet again some day!
It was bad enough that President Barrack Obama delivered the 2009 commencement speech at the University of Notre Dame. But then the Notre Dame President Rev. John Jenkins said that we should all work together to make adoption more available.I've been Catholic all my life and for a long time I've been a Notre Dame fan. In my honest opinion President Obama who supports abortion rights should never have been invited to speak and then to receive an honorary degree was a second mistake. He is entitled to his rights just as I am to mine. There will always be people on this earth with differing views.Was Rev. John Jenkins justifying President Obama delivering the commencement speech by saying that we should all work together to make adoption more available? Certainly he must be aware of all the adoption options in America. Agencies have been around for unwed mothers to turn to for over 60 years that I know of. Today some unwed mothers are monetary profiting quite nicely from making arrangements for their unborn to be adopted.Adoption is available and it seems to me that those who are not aware of it must not want to be. We adoptees are not bad people even though we are often labeled "troublemakers" for fighting for a civil right to be restored to all adopted adults so that they can have access to their original birth certificate.
For several years now there have been deceitful adoptees among the Internet adoption community. Several years ago I remember when one pretended to be helping other adoptees subscribed to a mailing list when she was in fact working for a well known company who has financially ripped off many people.
Just how new it is for an adoptee to lie about what state they were born or adopted in I don't know. I do understand when an adoptee pretends to live in a certain state when they are trying to get a legislator to listen to them.
But to lie to other adoptees to try to gain leadership over them does not set well with me. One lie can lead to another and we don't know what all they might be up to. We can't be certain if they really are for a clean bill or if maybe their motive is to cause harm to adoption reform in that particular state. We do know there are those among the adoption industry cashing in on closed records. So have these fabricators joined in with them while pretending to be a great advocate for open records?
I know one thing for certain and that is Illinois has giant RAT traps. But until a suspected RAT gets caught be certain and ask questions because often liars do give themselves away. Human RATS have long noses and have a tendency to be bossy and sarcastic when things are not going just the way they want. Bait your trap and get rid of the RATS! There are plenty of us that do want all adopted adults to have access to their OBC - you don't have to feel alone after the RATS are gone.
I find it so hard to believe that there are supporters of CA AB 372. I question if it is a strong case of stupidity or if they are seeing $ signs before their eyes if this bill would become law. I realize that some of these supporters believe that baby steps are sometimes necessary to achieve success. But they are not stopping to think about the states who have taken baby steps and now how hard advocates are fighting to get open records in those states. It is not just CI programs that are intact in some states that make legislators think that the state is up to date with adoption reform. If anything is in place that makes legislators think this, they can focus on other issues and fight any clean bill that is sponsored.
Some think that if a few adoptees are helped, that is better than none. No, it is not because all should be treated equally. Let's say there are two adoptees in one family. One gets their OBC and the other can not. Think about the feelings that will develop between these two and how the adoptive parents will feel about their children not being treated equally. This could happen with two adoptees who are close friends too or two cousins who were adopted... Will all the CA adoptees who support this horrible bill have access to their OBC? Chances are not all of them will. Then how many years will it take for adoption legislation to be changed for the better in CA? Will the supporters live long enough to see it happen or will it ever happen?
The chances of this bill being fixed are very slim. Supporters need to wake up and smell the roses in the states who do have open records. This bill MUST be defeated and the sooner the better. There are those who will argue that we all must unite to get records open. Well many of us have done so and we ask that you please join us and not support a bill that does not treat ALL adoptees equally. The adoption reform movement must move forward and not backward.
Once in a while I hear how some think it is just fine to take baby steps to change adoption laws. I cringe every time because I consider it a big mistake. It is not an easy task to change any law and adoption reform is certainly not a popular subject among those who are opposed to open records.
Illinois currently has an ineffective Registry and horror stories have resulted from the CI program. But yet in the eyes of many legislators adoption reform is at its best. In 2008 the belief among some was that if records were open to some adopted adults but not all that would be a step toward Illinois becoming an open records state. I don't recall hearing if any of these believers gave thought to how many years it might take before ALL adopted adults would have access to their OBC.
I'm not talking about just legislators. It is shocking how many adoptees who claim to be adovates for open records go right along with baby steps being taken. Just how many are monetary gaining from closed records is a number that we will never know.
Sadly it is not uncommon for an adoptee to be against open records. Some are profiting too much from closed records. There are some who don't care if they ever see their OBC so they speak out against anyone having access. My belief is that all these people should be tarred and feathered.
The next time someone mentions taking adoption reform in baby steps please ask them why they are so against Illinois becoming an open records state as soon as possible.
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